Three months ago, I suddenly started having panic attacks out of the blue. First they were all over the place, eventually that became less scary and now are exclusively in the night. When I fall asleep, like clockwork I'll wake up 3-4 hours later in the middle of a panic attack. Sometimes I can fall asleep again, but usually I cannot.
Sometimes my heart races, sometimes my body is shaking sometimes the panic is just in my head. It is actually the scariest when there are no physical symptoms and the heart is beating calmy because I feel like I'm about to faint and never wake up again.
Last year was very shit and I blame it on that. It's almost as if my brain figures out when one strategy to cause the dread doesn't work anymore and it comes up with a new one. I also cannot shake the feeling that there's something very wrong with my heart but there's absolutely no proof of that.